God has been doing so much lately!
In reality, If I were to have a conversation with someone detailing all the things He's done, I honestly don't think I could pinpoint all the little touches. You know, like when you can't stop looking at your spouse or significant other and you keep stupidly smiling at them; which leads them to ask "what?"
and your brilliant mind only comes up with "I don't know, I just love you.."
Because you just can't put into words in that moment all the things you notice about them, all the small glances you send their way as you watch them live their life- you just soak it all in, and can only muster "I don't know" in response to why you're staring.
And that's basically how I'm feeling about Jesus lately.
I can't place my finger on exactly what is going on or give a reason to why I'm more enthralled now than last month. I feel more connected, I have a hunger that I just can't seem to quench. I have 3 hours alone every morning at my workplace with access to an awesome speaker system that I get to use. I usually have worship music on for that time, but recently I've been loving listening to sermons from a church I adore: Bethel Church in Redding, California. My church- Bethel Cleveland- is not directly a branch of Bethel Redding, but they like to follow in its footsteps.
With all the things I've laid out in my previous post, which you can read here, it has been a busy year and life has gotten in the way of who truly deserves my attention: my Saviour. Stress has gotten the best of me. But then again, who hasn't stress robbed at some point? I don't think I know one person who can say they've escaped that terrible hole every time it comes into their path.
As I've gotten to listen to sermons in the morning, it's been helping to realign my thinking and renew my mind. And, thanks a lot, now I'm a sappy mess most of the time. I see one sentimental thing and my new-found mushy heart makes me cry. (Ladies, anyone?) Netflix, tears. Seeing a family with little kids, crying. Deep & profound quote hanging on a wall somewhere, here comes the flood.
That is one of the many things popping up in my daily life as Jesus does more and more heavy lifting for me. I'm remembering to consider people's feelings more deeply, to give more grace to daily happenings, to turn to prayer more often as a solution to my problems.
As a testament to my growth, I saw a necklace that I just had to buy when I walked into a boutique the other week. Really, I probably shouldn't have been in there since stuff costs, ya know, money...but I went in and I saw it and I had to have it.
Disclaimer, I DID text my husband to make him aware that I was buying jewelry. It is a small charm necklace with the simple phrase "It is well with my soul"
That's it. Tears. In the store.
Because it was! I was yelling in my head, "Yes! It IS well with my soul! What a coincidence."
That summed it up. This little green patch of spiritual growth that has snuck its way into my life was printed in physical form on a necklace that I saw the when I walked in the door. All is well with my soul; and that is the full accumulation of the little touches God has been doing, the answer to the "I don't know"s of why I've been so enthralled with my saviour lately-
He has settled my soul.
And when your soul is settled & your heart is full, you have peace.
I still have hard days at work. I still get prickly sometimes and don't think about the consequences of my words or actions before I blurt them out or make snap judgements. In fact, I had a rough day at work about 5 hours ago.
But, all is well with my soul.
And that is really as good as it gets. I'm thankful, I'm happy with life, I love my husband, I have coffee every day- perfection.
So, that's the little snippet of the grace this girl has grown in this week.
I hope all is well with your soul, too!
-Britney
